If you are interested learning more about the DBT for couples classes, please contact John Mader, LMFT, at jmaderlmft@gmail.com or 919-968-0231.

Why join DBT Skills for Couples?

Here are some of the skills that participants reported gaining from the most recent class:

Problem analysis
Accurate expression...identifying primary emotions, not reacting to secondary emotions.
Emotional Regulation...riding the wave and time outs are especially helpful
Validation, need I say more?
Mindfulness, using observe & describe in place of judgment, and acceptance.
Validation of self and partner.
Mindfully observe and describe
Validation of myself first since I am my own worst critic and will apologize for anything then validate partner so we can actually see what is and more often what isn't a problem.
Stopping inappropriate behaviors or responses with addition of self-soothing.
Listening and reacting "objectively" to what partner is saying so as to keep us out of the red zone. Partner tends toward rapid definitive verbal and postural judgment, which drives up my anxiety so I need to validate her. Then calmly move away from the fray and then come back to discuss it.
Keeping my emotions controlled allows me to speak logically and with awareness of consequences, as well as allowing me to separate the wheat from the chaff with partner. That about sums it up.
Maintaining an awareness of my emotions and emotional regulation
Listening when my partner is talking, rather than thinking of my rebuttal.
Validating what my partner is thinking / feeling / describing
Not to be judgmental, to describe what i am feeling / thinking
To use my wise mind, be present, be aware and present
Red zone behavior is counter-productive.
Validation
Acceptance. Trying to make sense of the situation. This gives me something to do instead of run towards fix-it mode.
The skill of "observing" (with the wise-mind) emotions in the moment of communication is a skill I want to hone. And validate!
Validation of myself first since I am my own worst critic and will apologize for anything then validate partner so we can actually see what is and more often what isn't a problem.
Stopping inappropriate behaviors or responses with addition of self-soothing.
Listening and reacting "objectively" to what partner is saying so as to keep us out of the red zone. Partner tends toward rapid definitive verbal and postural judgment, which drives up my anxiety so I need to validate her. Then calmly move away from the fray and then come back to discuss it.
Keeping my emotions controlled allows me to speak logically and with awareness of consequences, as well as allowing me to separate the wheat from the chaff with partner. That about sums it up.
Maintaining an awareness of my emotions and emotional regulation
Listening when my partner is talking, rather than thinking of my rebuttal.
Validating what my partner is thinking / feeling / describing
Not to be judgmental, to describe what i am feeling / thinking
To use my wise mind, be present, be aware and present
Red zone behavior is counter-productive.
Validation
Acceptance. Trying to make sense of the situation. This gives me something to do instead of run towards fix-it mode.
The skill of "observing" (with the wise-mind) emotions in the moment of communication is a skill I want to hone. And validate!